Enjoy the Wonder

I haven’t written about friendships in awhile. I think it’s time.

Lately, I’ve been feeling a bit overwhelmed by life. Some of my feeling overwhelmed is from very good things. And some of it is from the kind of things that make others say to you, “this, too, shall pass.”

I didn’t grow up in New York. But there are a lot of people here who make it feel like home. One of those people packed his car on Monday morning, driving off in search of better things.

I was so nervous I was going to miss saying goodbye to him that we ended up saying goodbye twice. Thinking he was already gone, I raced to his door, arriving out of breath. He answered and said he was behind schedule. I stood there chatting with him admist mostly packed luggage. I kept thinking to myself, “this is the end of an era.” I’m just not sure whose era was ending.

Two hours later, the car was loaded. This time, he was the one out of breath, knocking on a door. I’m sappy with goodbyes, so we just stood there lingering.

“It’s your job to look after him now,” he said about another friend. I was baffled that the baton had been passed to me.

Hours later, I realized the friend who left had always been the one to do the looking after. He was a man’s man. The kind who would break down your door if ever there was a fire.

This is a person I’ve been friendly with for years. But over the last two weeks, we’ve become real friends. We had both “fallen” down the same rabbit hole at the same time. He was this kindred spirt who just “got it.” You showed up as you were and traded truths. There was a certain toughness about him that I admired, wimpy he was not.

He did the smart thing in leaving. I’m waiting for the text messages to come through with great news.

I emailed my oldest friend, lamenting the rabbit hole and telling her how strange it was that he was gone. T. (the T. we met here and here) wrote back with this response:

Enjoy the Wonder // Likes to Smile

T.’s absolutely right. I have to enjoy the adventure that comes with life (and this rabbit hole). I have to enjoy becoming even better friends with an old friend. We can find joy in the rabbit hole and bring it back out with us. We can find wonder, too.

I wonder who’s going to look after you in your new home. And I wonder who’s going to look after me (what if there’s a fire?). But don’t worry. I’ll look after him.

Go find the joy and bring it out. Send me a great text message.

Thank you for making NY feel like home. I’m going to miss you.

xoxo,
Stacey

Comments

  1. Oh Stacey….such a touching post! You must be one seriously good friend to have. Hang in there – and remember that rabbits are sneaky little buggers that ALWAYS find their way back out of holes. In other news…Relax Your Heart has made its way into my house…and I now stare at it every day. :) Stay tuned.

    • Hi Kelly,

      Thank you so much! It was one of those posts I just felt SO compelled to write, so I’m really happy to hear that you found it touching. And you’re right… rabbits do ALWAYS find their way out of holes (thank you for the reminder) :)

      Meanwhile…I’m so thrilled to hear that “Relax Your Heart” has made its way into your home. I can’t wait to see what you’ve created!

      xoxo,
      Stacey

  2. This is such a beautiful post! And your friend T. is brilliant. I like to think that the rabbit hole, isn’t really a hole. It’s a tunnel, which means that there’s an exit somewhere. You’ll make it through, I’m sure of it!

    • Hi Allyssa! Thank you so much. I just felt compelled to write this post, so I appreciate the warm reception to it! And I LOVE LOVE LOVE the idea of a rabbit tunnel! xoxo

  3. He must be a great friend but you are definitely a great friend yourself. You are showing here what a big heart you have. Thanks for sharing this lovely story. :)

  4. This was beautiful — I love these tribute posts that you do. I had a good friend move away a few months ago, and it also felt like the end of an era. I found myself feeling kind of low recently and it took me a while to realize that, duh, I miss him! I guess the positive side to these hard feelings is that they remind us how important those times were, that they meant something. Go easy on yourself as you’re climbing out of the rabbit hole. I’ll be thinking of you.

    • Hi Cari! Thank you so much — it has been so nice that this post was so well-received because I just felt so compelled to write it. It’s hard to miss someone. I’m sorry you are missing a friend, too. Somewhere, somehow we were just really lucky they were present in our lives. You go easy on yourself, too. I’m thinking of you. xoxo

  5. What a beautiful tribute to your friends. I was always the person that moved away as a kid. As an adult, I have had a few good friends move and I think it’s almost tougher on the one that stays put. It can feel as though they have moved on to new adventures, and I’m stuck in the same place. Not that it’s a bad place. You will have new adventures just as Alice did and surprising discoveries along the way. Hang in there!

    • Hi Dawn,

      Thank you so much. I really felt so compelled to write it, so I’m happy to see it has received a warm reception. I think you might be right, it might be tougher on the one that stays put. But….I really do believe good things are on the horizon. Just like Alice found!

      xoxo,
      Stacey