I haven’t written about friendships in awhile. I think it’s time.
Lately, I’ve been feeling a bit overwhelmed by life. Some of my feeling overwhelmed is from very good things. And some of it is from the kind of things that make others say to you, “this, too, shall pass.”
I didn’t grow up in New York. But there are a lot of people here who make it feel like home. One of those people packed his car on Monday morning, driving off in search of better things.
I was so nervous I was going to miss saying goodbye to him that we ended up saying goodbye twice. Thinking he was already gone, I raced to his door, arriving out of breath. He answered and said he was behind schedule. I stood there chatting with him admist mostly packed luggage. I kept thinking to myself, “this is the end of an era.” I’m just not sure whose era was ending.
Two hours later, the car was loaded. This time, he was the one out of breath, knocking on a door. I’m sappy with goodbyes, so we just stood there lingering.
“It’s your job to look after him now,” he said about another friend. I was baffled that the baton had been passed to me.
Hours later, I realized the friend who left had always been the one to do the looking after. He was a man’s man. The kind who would break down your door if ever there was a fire.
This is a person I’ve been friendly with for years. But over the last two weeks, we’ve become real friends. We had both “fallen” down the same rabbit hole at the same time. He was this kindred spirt who just “got it.” You showed up as you were and traded truths. There was a certain toughness about him that I admired, wimpy he was not.
He did the smart thing in leaving. I’m waiting for the text messages to come through with great news.
T.’s absolutely right. I have to enjoy the adventure that comes with life (and this rabbit hole). I have to enjoy becoming even better friends with an old friend. We can find joy in the rabbit hole and bring it back out with us. We can find wonder, too.
I wonder who’s going to look after you in your new home. And I wonder who’s going to look after me (what if there’s a fire?). But don’t worry. I’ll look after him.
Go find the joy and bring it out. Send me a great text message.
Thank you for making NY feel like home. I’m going to miss you.